Don't lose your PLACE

So I haven't posted any blogs in a LONG time! Well, let me tell you what has happened in my life.
If you remember, I posted about how God gave me peace about going to a school called Texas Bible Institute, and that I was planning on going there. Well I'm here! This now marks my second week here. Let me tell you, the things I have learned here in just two weeks has been INCREDIBLE. I just wanted to share something that really stuck out to me in class. I thought it would encourage yall.
One of our classes is a DVD course. We do exactly what you're probably thinking-watch a DVD. One that we have been doing is called "Breaking Intimidation", by John Bevere. Something he said today in class was astounding to me.
He read out of 1 Kings 19, about Elijah. Long story short, in 1 Kings 17, Elijah tells Ahab, "Look man, there's not going to be any rain or dew until I say so." And so three years go by, and Lo and behold-no rain or dew. During those three years, Elijah does some pretty amazing stuff. (I won't spoil it for you-you can read it all in 1 Kings 17-18). So he then goes back to Ahab and says, "Hey man, go get all your prophets of Baal, and let's have a show down. We'll both sacrifice something, and whoever's god answers is the REAL God." As you can guess, it was Elijah's God, not Baal. So then, Elijah goes and kills a bunch of Baal's prophets. But suddenly (in 1 Kings 19), Jezabel says, "I'm gonna kill you in the next 24 hours for what you did."
When Elijah heard that, he suddenly felt intimidated. He, who just called fire and rain down from heaven (LITERALLY), feels so intimidated by this woman, that he runs away and hides in a cave. When God comes to him, he says, "Elijah. What are you doing here?" God was asking him, "Why have you run away? Why'd you give up, Elijah?" Elijah tells him a pity story. "Well God, the people tore down your altars and worship false gods and I'm the only one left and they want to kill meeeee." So God tells him to go outside. And out there, God speaks to him in a still, small voice. Elijah-who has just been fed by an angel, spoken to by God-goes BACK into the cave and lays down.
God asks him again, "Elijah, what are you doing here?" And you know what Elijah says? "But Goooood, the people tore down your altars and worship false gods and I'm the only one left and they want to kill meeeee." And guess what God tells him this time?
"Go find a man named Elisha and train him so that he can become a prophet TO REPLACE YOU." No joke. Go read it. To replace you.
I've never caught that before. That Elijah lost his place. When Jezabel threatened his life, he became INTIMIDATED. And that's an evil spirit. God had a great plan for Elijah. He could have destroyed Jezabel. He could have brought Israel back to the Lord. But instead, he became intimidated. And instead of allowing the Lord to speak to him and show him he had no reason to be intimidated, he retold his pity story. "I'm the only one left. They want to kill me." He forgot about God, and started dwelling on himself. And because of that, he lost his place.
When we feel a spirit of intimidation, instead of wallowing in self-pity, we ought to go to God. Forget ourselves. Talk to Him. And take authority in the Spirit and tell that evil spirit to go in Jesus' name.
I hope that encourages yall as much as it did me. And I'll post some more things soon. Love yall!
-A Christian Teenage Girl

"A Good Man Is Hard to Find"

We read that story in lit class. "A Good Man is Hard To Find", by Flannery O'Connor. To quickly summarize it, it starts out about a family taking a road trip. There is a mom, a dad (named Bailey), two children (a boy named John Wesley and a girl named June Star), and a grandmother. They take a car trip. On the way, the grandmother sees an old dirt road and remembers that there is a house down the old road. She manipulates everyone to take the road because she wants to see the house. But two things happen down the road. 1) The grandma remembers that the house she remembers was in Tennessee, and they were in Georgia. 2) The family has a car rec. Their car flips in a ditch, and they are stuck. Suddenly, another car shows up, and three people get out. Turns out, these three people are escaped convicts, one who is a murderer known as "The Misfit". The Misfit has his two buddies take everyone in to the woods and shoot them, but keeps the grandmother with him. He talks to her, and she begs for her life. But suddenly, the grandmother has an epiphony. She reaches out to the Misfit and says "You're one of my own. You're one of my babies." He jumps back and shoots her three times. As he and his two buddies are driving away, the Misfit says the closing line of the story: "She would've been a good woman, had there been someone there to shoot her every minute of her life."
When we finished reading this story, the classroom was filled with silence. Everyone was processing what had just happened and what had just been said. Finally someone broke it, saying "...wow." As our literature teacher began to discuss this story with us, I realized this story has a much deeper meaning. You see, the whole story, the grandmother thinks about "good people". She has an idea that "good" comes from appearances, money, being well educated, etc. Even when the Misfit is standing near her with a gun, she looks at his appearance. From the outside, you couldn't even tell he was a convict or murderer-he is described as looking "scholarly". She looks at his outward appearance and says "you wouldn't shoot a lady-you're a good man." Accourding to the grandmother, she herself is a "good woman". But on the inside-where "goodness" really is, she's not. The entire story, the grandmother wants her way-she wants to go to Tennessee, she wants to see a house, she wants to bring the cat, she wants this, she wants that. She always voices what she wants, and tried to even manipulate to get her way. But something happens to her near the end of the story.
Grandmother is sitting on the ground, begging for her life. Even at this point, it is a selfish plea, asking for the Misfit to spare her, and not her entire family. She is trying to manipulate the Misfit to not kill her, telling him he's a "good man" and whatnot. But when all her family has been shot and killed, and she suddenly realized she has no chance to live, she has what my literature teacher called "a moment of reality". What is more real than having a gun in your face, thinking you're going to die? In that moment, you would probably think of your family or your life, and realize what is "real" and "unreal". You would probably realize something about yourself that you could have changed in your life. That's what happened to grandmother. She had a moment-just one moment-in her life where she forgot herself. She didn't think about herself or her own wants or appearances. She became selfless for the first time in her life, and reached out to the Misfit. She saw him in a moment of distress and forgot that he was a murderer or that she was a lady. She forgot all that, and reached out to him, offering love and acceptance, as if he was her own baby. And this shocks the Misfit, so he kills her. But his final statement is the most profound statement in the entire story. "She would have been a good woman, if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life." If she had had a fun in her face ever minute of her life, she would have been truly good. The grandmother had an act going her whole life. She pretended to be a good woman. And it wasn't until the literal last moment of her life, when she had a gun pointed at her, that she changed.
This story made me really think about my life and how I am. When I come to the end of my life, I don't want to look back and think "I could have been so different-so much better." I don't want to be like the grandmother and think all my life that I was a truly "good" person. But I can't be a good person. Not on my own. Sure I can be polite to people and try to love them. But I can't on my own. I'm bound to screw up something or mess up something by myself. Which is why I need God. Why I need him to help me and whisper in my heart "Don't do that. That's not right" when I'm doing the wrong thing. I need Him by my side so that when I come to the end of my life, I don't look back and think "I could have changed so much." I want to look back and think, "I am so glad Jesus helped me be good everyday." I want to live my life in that "moment of reality", as if every minute of my life was my last. And with God's help, I can do that.

"She would have been a good woman,” The Misfit said, “if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life."